Phsycho
by Tdfgh1
Summary: Set after the coronation scene. What if being struck in the head caused a novel form of brain damage in which all the negativity and resentment Anna could have felt during her upbringing became dissociated and dormant, along with aspects of her intellect? The consumption of alcohol during the party causes this psychosis to come to light.
1. Chapter 1

There was the initial shock, a moment of blankness before she could register the look on her sister's face. Like a timid rabbit with darting eyes, backing away towards the door.

You're not running away so easily this time.

"I'll tell you what!" she called out, above the panicked murmur of the crowd. She caught her sister's attention and grinned, needing to interrupt the moment before it careened beyond control. "Why don't you go up to your room – the one you spent the last thirteen years in – and I'll clear this up" she motioned to the mess that nearly impaled her. "And then we'll have that talk alone. Sound good?"

Her sister paused then nodded, still looking unsure. Anna broke off a piece of ice and dropped in her drink before lifting her glass as…as a toast. To you sis and to revelation! Hopefully, that'll calm her down. She took a sip, still smiling while her sister backed out the door to her room. Once she was gone, the room erupted into chaos, it was so loud, and the voices were indistinguishable while their tone was accusatory, fearful, and even angry.

"Monster!" cried that grasshopper of a duke. "She's a monster!"

Anna turned to look at him. She could have picked him up and smashed his skull over the ice, right through the eyeball and – _ No!_ "My sister's not a monster." She said quickly instead. "She didn't mean for any of this to happen. She has no ill intentions."

"But you saw what she did, she nearly murdered us!"

"Yes well, that would've been kind of a bitch to clean up wouldn't it?"

Anna paused. What the hell? She thought. Did I just say that?

For the words seemed to leave her mouth before could think. It didn't sound like her at all. She downed her drink, perplexed and uneasy while the duke stormed off in disbelief. It took hours to calm everyone down enough to clear them out. She had to stand on the podium, the epitome cheer and regality and offer reassurances - bullshitting through her teeth – "We'll have this all under control, allow me to compensate for your troubles…" etc, etc…..

All these years, she thought as she watched the room empty. All this time and not a word from you. Why in the world didn't you say something? Anna sighed as she refilled her glass to the brim with a dark coloured liquor. She was getting drunker by the minute, her limbs feeling progressively heavier while her mind seemed to be lifting out of her head. It was a peculiar feeling that stopped her in her tracks; she wasn't expecting drunkenness to feel like this.

"Fucking hell!" she yelled suddenly to the empty room. For a second, she was shocked at herself until she felt a sharp pain in her temple and a flood of unnatural anger that seemed to secure itself out of nowhere. Thirteen years of suppressed guilt and resentment were finally on her tongue but words were too two dimensional to articulate the barrage of emotion exploding from her being. She took a gulp of her drink that felt like a blow to the back of her head.

"Fuck fuck fuck fucking _fuckity shit godamnit!_"She leapt up from her seat, pointing viscously at the empty space in front of her. "Fuck you to hell ! Thirteen fucking years you piece of shit fucking motherfucker!" She felt the presence of her rational mind as if she was watching herself in the Third Person, disconnected and observant.

"Oh I know bloody well I'm not being fair." She said in a quieter voice. "This must have been harder for you than for anyone, it's triggered a mammoth case of agoraphobia, I know that but I can't help it right now – I could fucking kill you! Maybe. Fuck! Fuck fuck fuckity shit!" She took another gulp. "It's not your fault, we were raised all wrong but it don't change the fact that you're a fucking batshit crazy piece of fucking work! Fuck you! - I'm not going to feel this way forever, it'll pass and you don't deserve it but for now - fuck you to fucking hell!"

She had to take a breath.

"I could bash you over the head with a candleholder." She muttered, suddenly quiet. She could hardly believe she was saying it out loud. So she was a talkative drunk. "I could take a hammer and break your ribs one by one by one, I could shoot your knees out, I could sever your frontal lobes with a pencil, I could take an axe and…"

Anna had to pause. Could she do it? Everyone has their fantasies and intrusive thoughts are fairly common but actually doing it is something else altogether. My god, she had never felt this close to the surface before. She searched for a sense of revulsion but could find none.

"….What is wrong with me?"

No answer. She shrugged, almost amused and staggered out the door to find her sister.

* * *

Anna could never appreciate castles. It was a huge inconvenience getting around – the storage room was in itself a ten-minute walk from the ballroom while the storage room to her sister's room was twenty-five minutes. Her arms were killing her.

"'Hey!" she called out. "So 'how bout that talk?"

"You should go." Replied her sister. "I don't want to cause any more damage."

Anna laughed in disbelief. "Are you kidding? It's a little late for damage control, open the door!"

No answer. Like always, even now after the jig was up, after all these years. Anna stood there for a moment marveling at her frustration for the amount of frustration coursing through her was ridiculous. And it was misplaced but there was nothing that could be done about that. She gripped the axe with both hands and raised it high above her head before sending it crashing through the thick door of her sister's room, listening in delight to the cracking splintering of wood. Filled with adrenaline, she yanked and managed to dislodge the axe, stumbling backwards from the momentum and nearly falling over. She righted herself up, swaying drunkenly and was about to strike again when the door opened.

"What the hell are you doing?!" exclaimed Elsa indignant at first before she noticed the state of her younger sister who standing in the middle of the hall, swaying from side to side, her eyes unfocused but bright, gripping _an axe_ tightly as if using it for balanced.

"Well fuck me, look who decided to open the door!" Anna grinned and staggered forward.

"Anna what's happened to you?" said Elsa, stunned as she backed away into her frost covered room "Are you drunk?"

"Oh drunk, what's drunk? I'm more myself right now than I've ever been, you should try it sometime!"

"I'll think I'll pass." Elsa eyed the axe worriedly. "Now…you said you wanted to talk?"

"You ever wondered what'll happen if you cut off your hands?"

Elsa's eyes widened and she stared at her sister, speechless. "I….._what?!_" Good lord what have I done to her?

Anna burst out laughing and explained in a slur, "Well I….I jus' noticed that your frozen output or wha'ever seems to be emitted from the extremities. Like your hands which leads one to wonder: what would happen if we cut them off?"

"…..I've never thought about it….."

Anna continued. "Well I think it would move from the next available spot like the wrists. BUT THEN – what about blood? Would you freeze your own blood? How does that work? How come your fingers don't freeze and fall off from gangrene every time you shoot ice?"

"I…I don't know. Look I think you need go and sleep this off."

"Well of course I do, but I've got an important task here! We could make some real significant observations – do you have a third circulatory system running with endothermic activation energy? If that's the case, then what the hell is insulating it? Like how have you not died from the inside out? Or is it derived from a superhuman overdrive in your metabolism where the excess energy is just expelled? Or maybe it's being absorbed from the environment like plant absorbing CO2 and emitting oxygen? " Anna looked at her sister, holding her axe outward. She imagined the impact of the blade hacking through bones, cracking and splintering like wood, the blood spurting then solidifying. If she held a light to the wound, she may be able to distinguish abnormal structures, a hidden artery or discoloration due to cold. And how would you feel about that? She asked, thinking in the third person. "Only one way to find out."

Elsa looked be at a loss, completely astounded but not yet fearful, as if she didn't believe Anna to be capable of such mutilation. "I am not going to submit to an autopsy," she said authoritatively.

"What if I just cut off a finger?"

"No Anna."

"What if I cut off my own finger in solidarity and then yours? It should be reattach able, I'll make a clean cut."

"You're being ridiculous….." Elsa trailed off as Anna zigzagged across the room to a desk where she laid out her hand, fingers outstretched. She gripped the axe near the blade and was about to bring it down when a gust of frigid air swirled around the room and ice shot up walls. "Oh my god, Anna stop!" cried Elsa, with rising fear and disbelief. "You can't be serious about this, put down the axe!"

Anna turned to her sister with that familiar optimistic, carefree look. But the eyes shone and her lip curled up in a smirk. "You don't have to protect me, I'm not afraid. I'm too drunk for it to hurt much." With that, she brought the blade down on her index finger with a _crack_ \- _thud_, barely audible over Elsa's shrieking.

At first she was amused by her sister's reaction, then mesmerized by the sight of her blood dripping into the carpet. Then –

"Oh fuck! Oh shit motherfucker fuck!" Her nerves were still intact, she had cut it too short and there was pain, a fiery unrelenting pain radiated down her hand and outward where her finger used to be. She picked up the severed digit, breathing heavily. "Fuck fuck GODAMNIT! Fuck you Elsa!" her voice was thunderous, pain feeding anger, feeding pain. "Fuck you for all of this, fuck you to hell and back, _you're mad! You're stark raving mad!" _ Her third person self looked on disapprovingly while she groaned, forcing herself to speak quieter as she turned to her sister, glowering as blood dripping down her arm.

She whispered, "Now it's you're turn."


	2. Chapter 2

**Note: I was doing some reading the other day and found something by this 16th century humanist that really speaks to whats happening here:**

**'Jupiter has bestowed far more passion than reason - you could calculate the ratio as 24 to one...Reason does the only thing she can and shouts herself hoarse, repeating the formulas of virtue while the other two bid her to go hang herself, and are increasingly noisy and offensive, until at last their Ruler is exhausted, gives up and surrenders.'**

**And I don't own anything.**

…...

Elsa backed up against the wall, horrified at the state of her little sister. She wanted to run away, wanted to call the guards but she couldn't. The instinct to protect was too engrained, even now as Anna trudged towards her, teeth gritted like an animal, reeking of booze and blood.

It was beginning to snow.

"Anna , I'll get you help." She was pleading with her. "I'll get you someone to talk to - a therapist or something. Just put down the axe."

Anna's expression seemed to soften at that. "You need help, I need help – I know, I know." said her third person. "It's not your fault, you don't deserve this and I won't be angry forever, no, no not at all." The third person paused and Anna erupted. "BUT RIGHT NOW – I'll bash your head in with a candle holder, I'll break your ribs with a hammer, I'll dig your brain out through your eye, fuck fuckity fucking hell!"

A cold wind blew across the room, sweeping up snow and ice fragments like some feeble defense. Ice was creeping up to cover the ceiling.

"I - I never wanted to hurt you," said Elsa, her voice rising in panic. She kept her hands clenched at her sides. "You were supposed to be safe."

"Safe?!" Anna strode up to her sister in a rage. Now more than ever, she felt like she could do it. But you shouldn't! Exclaimed the Third Person. It's not right, she's just a poor girl - "Shut up! Is that why you told me to leave? To keep me safe and let me lead my life? Oh well that's a brilliant idea, why the fuck didn't I think of that?"

"Anna I –"

"It's because I couldn't abandon you! I felt so, so sorry for you, it was exhausting and pointless and it tore me up, but now!" she gripped her axe with both hands. "Now I have no more room to give a damn! So fuck you and fuck this godamn shit!" She raised the axe above her head and brought it straight down with all her strength as Elsa screamed and instinctively brought her arms up to protect herself, bringing a wall of ice up from the floor, a moment too late. Anna was thrown back and sent into a bout of dizziness. She shook her head and got up to observe, her heart pounding. The alcohol was beginning to wear off and she was feeling nauseas.

The handle of the axe was embedded in a thick sheet of ice with the entire blade sticking out at the other side. It had been stuck in the motion of striking and for a moment, Anna wasn't even sure if it met its mark until she heard a cry of pain and shock. The Third Person was in the background, yelling and scolding incoherently as Anna stepped to the side to survey the damage.

Look at what you did! It screamed at her. What are you going to do with this, what is wrong with you, you psychopathic _monster-you're the monster-monster_-_monster - _

"Shut up!" Anna snapped. "Will you shut up for once and let me think?" her head was beginning to clear and her vision grew sharper. Elsa had crumpled to the ground, knees drawn up around her arm that had a wide, nasty looking gash with fragments of bone visible through the profuse bleeding. _So how do you feel about that?_ Anna stepped closer, head cocked to the side in thought. There was a swelling of sadistic satisfaction while on a parallel plane; the sight was pitiful. Her sister looked down right terrified, shuddering in shock as blood soaked through her clothing, her face growing paler and paler. She was staring at Anna, wide-eyed, unable to speak through the pain and fear and the guilt of causing such insanity.

You know she's seen you talking to me, said the Third Person in response. You look insane and to top it off, you're missing a finger.

"Do you not think I've noticed that?" said Anna to the ceiling.

"Who…. who are you talking to?" asked Elsa, her voice shaking and barely audible as she shrunk further into the wall.

"It's…I don't even know."

There was a moment of silence and they could hear birds outside as the day was beginning.

I've done my bit, Anna realized as she observed the results of her drunken escapade. The torrent of emotion that had been let loose due to Elsa's reveal was beginning to dry up, as well the resulting impulsive sadism. All that was left to do was for the Third Person to sink and meld back into its place in her mind. She could feel it clawing at her ears, crawling through the funnels as she felt blood drying on her arm, and the sting of her severed finger. It had entered her brain at the auditory cortex and was working it's way up, taking back its roots so that she felt her stomach drop at the sight of her sister's wounds. The sun was coming up, causing the ice to shine, illuminating the bloody axe, the white bits of bone sticking out of her sister's arm, and how deathly pale she was. How she was shaking.

There was a moment of clarity where Anna was completely in the clear, looking as if for the first time at the scene. A wave of terror crashed down on her and she opened her mouth to scream when -

"This obviously didn't help with your agoraphobia." She interrupted herself in a calm voice. Anna knelt down beside her sister, incredulous, horrified, and homicidally furious. Elsa shrunk back, whimpering.

"Please…. don't…."

"We're done, it's alright."

"…. Why did… why did you do this?"

I have no idea why! I could never have done this, god I'm so sorry -

"Why?" That was a good question. Anna thought in silence while the sadist evaporated from the fringes of her mind like thawed ice and the Third Person settled completely at the seat of the frontal lobes, causing an instant of pressure behind her eyes. She had to think for what seemed like a good while then replied. "It's…. well I suppose it's because I love you."

Elsa managed a look of confusion. "Wha…..?"

"It's difficult to explain. We probably don't have time right now anyway." The Third Person in Anna's mind waved their four fingers. "I'm going to get us a nurse. I shouldn't have done this; I don't know what they were thinking. But we'll fix this. I promise you that."

With that she got up and walked wordlessly out the door while Elsa sank into unconsciousness.

* * *

_I bet she's the one who did this to you._

Anna said nothing. She was sitting in the waiting room of the infirmary, her finger sewn up and bandaged. She stared at the floor, pretending she didn't hear anything. She may not have heard anything, maybe she was just thinking it.

…_..a type of radiation that's seeped into your 'head….._

There was a draft where she was sitting, coming from an open window down the hall that lead to the hospital area. The cold air was whistling into her ear, distorting itself into a genderless hiss.

…_seeped into your 'head – _

"Shhhh." said Anna, her heart beating up her throat.

_Through the locked door, through the floor, through the ceiling into your head that fucking bitch…_it was singing.

_Don't be ridiculous!_

Anna's eyes widened. She recognized this one from earlier, the one that kept yelling at her when she was attacking her sister. It had an accent, she noticed. It was difficult to place but it sounded from somewhere in the west, the way it didn't annunciate the T in don't. Good god, she never should gotten drunk.

_You're idiots, the both of you._

"You're the sister aren't you?"

Anna jumped at the clarity of this new voice until she saw it was the nurse from earlier.

"Yes!" she stood up anxiously. "Yes, that's me. Is she alright?"

The nurse looked surprised at her concern. "She'll be fine. She's had a bit of a shock, a bit of blood loss but it's nothing she won't recover from." She eyed Anna warily. "The Queen says that it's you who attacked her."

Anna had tried to prepare herself for this but between the arguing in her head and the inexplicableness of what she had done, all she could manage was a helpless shrug. "I…it didn't feel like me" she tried to explain. "I mean _now_, I would never dream of –"

_Should have strangled the bitch – _

_Go drown some cats till you've calmed down._

" – oh Christ. No. No I would never do that"

There was a pause where they just stared at one another, unsure of each other's state. Anna could imagine the contrast she was displaying; from homicidal maniac to charismatic smooth talker to her old self. Was she going to be arrested? Would Elsa arrest her?

"I've been instructed to give you this address." said the nurse, handing Anna a card. "It's a discreet office in town. You've been ordered to attend four sessions this month to determine your mental state."

"Oh okay." The card was made of a thick, glossy paper with raised lettering that read: Dr. Brain Taylor: Clinical Psychologist. And an American, that's rare. "Say, you should get Elsa to see this guy. Agoraphobic nervous wreck that she is." Anna blinked. Again, that feeling of words leaving her mouth without her putting them there.

The nurse nodded and went away, somewhat in a hurry. Anna breathed a sigh of relief that hadn't started another cursing stream. And that she hadn't killed the nurse.

…


	3. Chapter 3

She was glad to be able to go out. It was different from the first time when she had been filled with elation, grinning and going around excitedly at everything, not caring that anyone saw. Like nothing was in her way. Now, she had dressed herself up like a commoner, in a plain skirt, a cotton t shirt and a black cap and jacket that she had buy from a stable worker. But still, she enjoyed the open spaced and she marveled silently at all the displays of village life, keeping her hands in her jacket pockets and her cap pulled over her face. The persons in her head or whatever they were were keeping quiet for now. The Doctor's office was situated at the beginning of a residential area and was itself a medium sized house with a sign over the door with the name Brain Taylor Ph.D.

"Alright then." Anna took a breath and steeled herself to open the door. She entered a foyer with polished wooden floors and a receptionist's desk at the far end. She'd never been in a place like this before and for a moment, just stood there awkwardly.

_You gonna stand there all day like a dumbass? _

"Yes?" called the man at the desk, sounding bored.

"Oh hi! – I'm here to see Dr. Taylor."

"Do you have an appointment?"

"Yes. For 2:30.

"Take a seat."

Anna looked around at took a seat on an old looking leather couch by the window. She couldn't relax, what was going to happen here?

Phycology was a recent development, and had only entered the mainstream three or four years ago. Anna never read much into such things except for a few times as a teenager. She was bored and was too old for dolls so she turned to books. There was fiction, a bit of history, and few biographies. She liked the biographies for it was like getting to know another person until she came a cross a textbook on physical diagnosis. She could never be sure what drew her to it but there was something fascinating about the sorts of ailments that could afflict people. Something profoundly personal, which was lacking in her life. She whipped through the physical diagnosis book, despite having to look up all the terminology, which led her to an anatomy guide. Then a surgeon's manual and then a few more that she had more or less forgotten about.

_Well we haven't forgotten it._

Then she came across this huge, whopping thing; a Documentation of Epidemics throughout Europe. It was like an adventure story tied to a biological study, with doctors tramping about the most god-forsaken places in search of bats and mice and the infamous Patient Zero. Anna enjoyed it thoroughly until she got to the part about a reoccurrence of the Black Plague. She had turned the page and there on the other side was a full - length portrait of a dying patient. She had seen pictures in these books before but they were roughly drawn and most of them were diagrams. But this one, this was a real man, really dying. There was plain agony on his face and his body was covered in ghastly, dark blisters the size of chicken eggs. She remembered how she had to tear her gaze away from it before shutting the book for good. She could never read anything like that again for every time, she'd envision the real person, what they'd look like, how they'd suffer. She couldn't stand it.

So she took to singing as her new pastime.

"The Doctor'll see you now."

"What – now?" The receptionist shot her a look that prompted her to get up. "Do I just-"

"Yes. Up there." He rolled his eyes.

Anna made her way up the stairs to domestic looking wooden door. Was she supposed to knock or…..?

"For fucks sake." The Third Person muttered and pushed open the door.

Anna looked around in surprise. She hadn't remembered the door opening.

"You must be Anna." said Dr. Taylor at the end of the room. He was a middle aged-ish man with a square face and dark eyes that gave him a rather piercing look. But he managed look friendly as he smiled and motioned for Anna to take a seat across from him over a large desk. She draped her jacket over the chair and sat down, filled with trepidation as she fiddled with her cap on her lap. Guess that's one way I resemble Elsa, she thought.

"So Anna." Dr. Taylor was saying, "How are you today?"

"Am I in trouble?"

"Not with me. Try not to think in terms of 'being in trouble' since it's important that you feel comfortable here." He opened a drawer and took out a pen and notepad. "Can I get you anything? Water, coffee?"

"No, I'm…I'm good."

"Good." He got up and sat down somewhere behind her so that all she could hear was his voice. "Now tell me a bit about yourself."

"Okay…." Where was she supposed to begin? "Well I'm eighteen years old, I….I like sandwiches – it's broad question Doctor, was there something specific you were hoping to get outta this?" Anna gulped. She could never get used to that.

"Actually yes. How would you describe your relationship with your sister, the Queen?"

"Well, it's complicated. We used to be really close when we were little but one day, she just shut me out."

"Did that upset you?"

"I didn't really know what to make of it. I never knew the truth until that outburst at her coronation – but Dr. Taylor, you have to understand, I could never have attacked her like that!"

"What do you mean?"

"It's…well it was my fault, she freaked out. I met a guy and we were going to get married which set her off –" she paused, waiting for the Doctor to tell her off but he kept silent. She continued. "She said we couldn't and I kept pressing her about why she shut everyone out and….well she showed us all."

"Yes, I heard about that. Ice was it?"

"Yes. Anyway, Elsa looked like she was going to run away and I couldn't let her. I guess I drank a bit too much by then cause I called out to her. I mean normally, I'd be useless in that kind of situation but I called to her and _directed_ her to go to her room."

"How did you feel when your sister revealed herself?"

"That's the weird thing!" Anna turned around to face the Doctor. "I wanted to help her but it's like I was being drawn to the back of my consciousness like….like you know when you're dreaming and you're aware of everything that's going on but you're not actually a part of it?"

"Like you're just an observer?" the Doctor was struggling to hide his interest. "Turn back around."

"Exactly! But I could _feel_ it, I _felt _how angry I was but it wasn't me. I was completely detached from it all, like I was watching a play. At first , I thought I was just drunk but then there was all this shouting and cursing and….something more than anger." She paused before continuing in a quiet voice. "I….I really wanted to hurt Elsa. Whatever I turned into wanted to see her suffer but it was curious too. I mean Elsa's got some serious kinetic chemistry going on with those powers and it wanted to know how it worked, wanted to….to cut her up and see what was happening."

"Was there something telling you to do this? Were there voices, visual hallucinations egging you on?"

"No. I mean….." Anna forced herself to remember, hoping she wouldn't make herself sick. "There was a voice but it wasn't encouraging me or whatever it was to continue. It was the opposite."

"Can you describe it?" He flipped to a new page, scribbling notes furiously.

"It….I remember it yelling a lot." Anna closed her eyes, clutching her hat. "It was saying to stop, that it wasn't right - it wasn't fair what was happening and that Elsa was just a poor girl with Ag – something phobia."

"Agoraphobia."

"Yes. And this wasn't _me _talking either. In retrospect I agreed with it but I was somewhere else, in the audience." Anna suddenly remembered a moment, towards the end. She tensed visibly and tried to continue. "…except …..there's this one time…."

"Yes? It's alright Anna, you can say it."

"There was this moment after…you know. I had woken up for a moment into the dream and there was blood everywhere – I had _cut off_ my own finger. And when I saw what I did to Elsa, I was going to scream but then I sort of….fell back asleep."

"I see. And when did you return to normal?"

"It was after I went to get a nurse. I mean, that wasn't really me either come to think of it. I'd have been too traumatized."

"Was it the one who did the attacking?"

"I don't think so." Anna was silent for a moment. She didn't want to talk about this anymore. She wanted to put it all behind her and go home. '_Well obviously, you can't do that' _she thought, or she thought she was thinking_ 'you know it as well as' – 'put Elsa in a vacuum and watch her freeze her own –'_ _ "_It was the other one!"

Dr. Taylor looked up as Anna had nearly yelled her response. "The other voice?"

"Yes. I think so. It knelt down beside Elsa and it was….nice to her. It wasn't like the other one at all and it wasn't me. It was comforting and helpful like I wanted to be but it was too calm to be anything natural."

Dr. Taylor wrote a few final notes before returning to his desk. He looked carefully at Anna's face as he calculated what to say next. "I am quite certain you won't be held accountable for what happened." His tone was gentle and he leaned back into his seat as if to put her at ease. "But to be safe, I would like you to start taking something."

"Like medication?"

"Exactly." He got up and opened a cabinet, tucked away at the far side of the room. Inside, Anna could see shelves upon shelves of bright orange containers with carefully printed labels stuck lengthwise. The Doctor took two bottles from the top shelf. "What's your mother's maiden name?" he called.

"Karlsson."

He wrote 'Anna Karlsson' on both bottles as well as his signature before putting one back on the shelf and the other to her. "I'm going to try two types of antipsychotics" he explained. "The one I'm giving you now is a benzodiazepine. I recommend you try to take it when you feel that you might 'fall asleep' to prevent anymore violent behavior."

_You can't make me take that shit, I'll throw it up, you hear me –_

"What's the other one?"

Dr. Taylor stared at her, a flash of curiosity going across his face. "The other one is a type of neuroleptic. It's quite new – in fact all of this is highly experimental but it's had one of the best results in clinical studies."

That was somewhat comforting. The tablets she was given were unlike any kind of medication she had seen before. Usually they came in glass bottles in a liquid form but these were round, smooth, perfectly manufactured tablets with a slit down the middle. For a moment, she felt that old curiosity coming back to her that drove her to read and research, searching for something to connect with….

It had started to snow outside.


	4. Chapter 4

This was ironic.

It was an irony that felt like a slap to the face. Or more accurately like ten stitches and a shattered forearm that practically had to be reconstructed. Elsa sat up. She was still in the hospital, her arm set in a splint and wrapped tightly in bandaging. She was scheduled to get a cast put on the next day but there was no way she staying here any longer for her very presence appeared to be enough to send everything to hell.

All this time, she had tried to protect everyone – protect Anna. She could never have lived with herself if anything happened again and yet, something did happen. Something. Elsa didn't know what to make of it; it could have been from the isolation, or some novel form of brain damage but there was something very, very wrong with Anna.

"There's a godamn understatement." Elsa muttered as she carefully swung her feet over the side of the bed and stood up shakily. This was a nightmare. She hardly even cared that her powers had been revealed anymore for the insanity displayed by her dear sister. It wasn't even a simple case of psychopathy – well there was some violent psychopathy but the way Anna had talked to herself, switching tones and intentions and _accents _implied there was something more. Elsa could only hope the doctor would figure it out and find a way to help.

It was the very least she could do before she left.

...

It was the oddest sensation to see snowflakes in the middle of summer. Kind of surreal since it was still fairly warm and everyone was still out in their summer attire.

Anna began to walk home, ignoring the whispering in her head. She hoped the weather would simply pass, it had to. Elsa had ice powers but it's not like she could change the seasons right? She couldn't rotate the earth and surely, she didn't posses the energy required to maintain a winter environment over an area so large?

It was getting rapidly colder. By the time Anna got home, it felt like late October and there was a definite crispness in the wind.

"Oh this is not good." Anna muttered as she entered the castle grounds. It was cold enough for snow to start sticking to the ground. How far was it possible for this to progress? This must be taking a tremendous amount of energy – and who knew what kind of state Elsa was in to have caused this?

"There she is!" the Captain of the Guards came rushing towards her followed by what looked to be a physician and of course, the grasshopper Duke of Somewhere.

Before Anna could get a word in, the Duke interjected. "You're behind this too aren't you?"

She loathed that man. That simpering little fucker – what no!

"No!" she took a breath to collect herself. "No, I didn't mean for this, Elsa didn't either! Where is she?"

The physician stepped forward. "She was last seen running across the fjord."

"_Across_ the fjord?"

They all exchanged glances at her obliviousness. Anna's heart was racing, it was even colder than before.

"I think you'd better come with me." said the Captain finally. He escorted her out the gates, and through the streets that were already filled with astonished civilians, gawking at the now heavy snowfall. They got to the warph and he motioned outwards at the completely frozen fjord. Anna's jaw dropped at the sight. She, as well as the others were not expecting this at all. The water was covered in a thick sheet of white ice as far as the eye could see while the ships were held fast in their places – it looked like something from the Arctic! And it had been summer yesterday!

Anna had no words. But the others had plenty to say.

"Oh Elsa you motherfucker, what're we gonna do with you?

The Captain looked down at her, his brow raised. "We _are_ waiting on your order."

Anna shook her head. She could hear herself, in her own voice saying things she never would.

"I have to after her." She declared to the Captain, to the things trying to take over her mind. She needed to be forceful and imposing as they were. "This was my fault, I….I drove her to away and _I'm _the one who needs to bring her back."

The Captain paused at her odd mannerisms but then nodded. "I'll bring your horse."

* * *

'_You'll be dead in a day going out like that.'_

Anna was about to mount her horse when she heard it. She tried to ignore it but it persisted, clearer than ever.

'_You think you can just up and leave? You'll freeze and starve and –'_

Oh good lord, it was talking to her. She felt herself go pale at the realization. Should she answer it? No. No she shouldn't indulge, it'll only make it worse –

Anna got off her horse and marched straight back to the castle, muttering angrily at herself. She made a beeline to her room, ignoring the staff who may or may not have noticed the steely, deadpan expression on her usually bright face. They were working in tandem this time as their objectives matched for once, shutting the original Anna out of her own consciousness.

She changed into a pair of thick trousers, and winter gear, suitable for harsh travel before taking a satchel and heading to the kitchen for provisions, again ignoring everyone in her path. She grabbed anything non -perishable, a first aid kit, a long kitchen knife and after a brief internal debate, rope and a handful of Anna's pills. She snuck into the infirmary, into the supplies closet and grabbed a new, hypodermic needle. It was a fascinating contraption to both of them. She placed it carefully in her front pocket, as to avoid breaking the glass. Next, she took a small vial with a cork stopper, filled it with warm water and dissolved three pills, which she placed with the needle.

The Third Person wasn't all that enthusiastic about this idea. It was only for emergencies.

She pulled her hood up to hide most of her face as she made her way back to the horse, her gait straight and purposeful. She hung her satchel over the saddle and swung herself up easily when someone called for her.

* * *

No she shouldn't indulge, it'll only make it worse –

Anna opened her eyes and looked around wildly. It was as if she blinked and skipped through time, allowing her to completely change outfits and gather what looked to be supplies in less than a second. It was the most surreal feeling she had ever experienced. How long was she out anyway?

Her heart stopped when something responded '_Just a few minutes, don't worry bout it.'_

"Anna!"

She turned around. It was Hans! Someone normal and familiar, thank god. He caught up to her, out of breath. "Anna I heard what happened."

"You...you did?"

"Yes!" He grinned at her. "I had no idea you that's what you were thinking!"

"Me neither!" she was dismayed but that grin on his face was….out of place.

"Wait – what do you mean?" his eyes narrowed. "Didn't you try to kill your sister?"

"No! That wasn't me – I mean it sort of was but…." she sighed in aggravation. She couldn't even explain what was happening to her. " In any case, I'm going after her."

"What?" Hans stared at her in confusion. "Why? Isn't she dangerous?"

"My sister's not danger – well she _is_ dangerous the way a cross bow wielding five year old is dangerous."

Hans stared at her. "So….."

"Could you look after things while we're gone?"

His face brightened immediately. "Absolutely! – are you sure you don't want me to accompany you?"

Anna shook her head. "I'll only be gone a few days. It'll be better if I go alone anyway, Elsa's not exactly a people person."

"Good luck then. I'll be waiting for you." He said it gravely but his eyes were grinning. He was behaving a strangely as she was.

* * *

**Can anyone guess the premise behind the violent alter ego? Hint: Solidarity...something fascinating about the sorts of ailments that could afflict people. _Something profoundly personal..._**


	5. Chapter 5

How well can you really know a person?

Anna had been thinking about it the whole trip. At first it just a strategy to avoid conversing with the alters but it was a good question. You spend more than decade trying to get to know someone, you pick things up here and there; certain preferences, habits, maybe gain a sense of their personality if you're lucky…

'_It's the important things that are most evasive'_

"I know right?" said Anna. "You think you know someone and then they go and drop a bomb like secret ice powers."

'_Or they break into your room and try to cut off your hands.'_

"Okay that wasn't – oh no. No, no, I am not talking to you things – leave me alone!"

"_Also, its called cryokenesis."_

She should have brought Hans along, or a guard or a mountain guide – any real, live person to talk with and keep her grounded in reality. Solitude breeds' lunacy. In fact, she was surprised Elsa didn't have a problem like this. Sure, she's got some severe anxiety but that's quite tame considering what she's been through, being isolating within a single room for thirteen years. Anna had had the entire castle to roam about and somehow, she's ended up the lunatic. Was she just weak? Or did she have some hereditary predisposition to mental disorder?

Or maybe she had been dropped on her head.

Elsa was the easiest person to track. There were no footprints but she left an aftermath of snow and ice in her wake. There was this one area that looked like a tidal wave had struck then froze in place , leaving massive, lance like icicles protruding horizontally at every surface. It wasn't surprising when they came across an ice bridge.

…

_I am going to be courteous in telling you that I should handle this._

It seemed the alters were able to control how clear they were in her mind. Sometimes they were just whispers, creating a hissy wall of white noise while at other times, they would….well it wasn't yelling, although they did that too. It was as if they were controlling their clarity so that Anna could hear the shape of every syllable, the exertion of breath as they spoke. Anna shuddered at the thought and knocked on the door of the ice palace.

_I said I should handle this._

It didn't yell but it had turned the volume up to a nearly painful decibel, causing Anna to wince.

"She's my sister." said Anna. "I know we can fix this –"

It was different from the first time. There was no feeling of lifting, it was more like she had been sedated and was sinking into the background. She had no capacity to feel panic. She could only observe as if she were in a dream. She felt her posture go loose, her shoulders relaxed, while her back straightened, causing her to stand taller. She crossed her arms with a lopsided grin on her face.

What is the point in arguing if you're just going to take over?

"I told you." replied the Third Person. "I was being courteous."

She pushed open the door and entered a large, blue foyer. It was an impressive sight. It was huge to begin with and spacious with a high, domed ceiling supported by thick, glassy columns, a frozen fountain centerpiece and a curved staircase, leading to a platform. It was incredible! Anna and the other one thought so but the Third Person had no such feeling. It was purely objective in its thinking and it headed straight for the stairs. And it had a different gait, Anna observed from the back room. It was more relaxed, the steps were wider and the toes pointed out more. She hopped up the stairs, nearly running and was about to reach the platform when Elsa appeared from around the corner.

"Hey there!"

Elsa yelped in surprise and jumped back until she was standing a good few feet from her sister. Elsa stared at her for a moment, wide eyed as if she were expecting another attack.

"…Anna?"

"Lets say that I am." she smiled the way a doctor smiles at their patients. "In fact, before we begin, I'd like to apologize on behalf of my colleague."

"Colleague? Anna, what colleague? What are you doing here?" her usual regal demeanor had gone out the window and that same, darting look came over her face as if she wanted to run away.

The Third Person observed this without feeling, the other one felt taking her neck and slamming her against the wall, and Anna wanted to reach out to her, tell her it was going to fine. "It's going to be fine." She said, holding her hands out in an 'I come in peace' gesture. "Don't worry, I'm not the one who did _that." _She pointed to Elsa's wounded arm that was bandaged up to the elbow.

That was somewhat reassuring. Reassuring enough for Elsa to take a good look at her sister. She looked like Anna, that was for sure but her expression was cunning, she stood taller and all that reckless, restless energy seemed to have disappeared, causing her posture and gestures to come off looser, almost cocky. And her speech was slurred into an American sounding accent. Elsa had never heard of anything like this. It was beyond insane and she struggled to compose herself.

"Look, you don't have to apologize." she backed away further. "But you should probably go."

_Are you fucking kidding me?_

Anna laughed at that. "Elsa, you do not want to go saying things like that – it causes total chaos upstairs!" she pointed at her temple. "Do you want to be lettin out the Psycho?"

"Oh Jesus Christ. Are you….is there more than one – you know what, never mind. You need to leave. Goodbye Anna."

"Don't start this again–"

"No, I'm just trying to protect you!" that came out a bit forcefully and she saw a flash of something go across Anna's face.

"Oh protect me you say? Protect me – have you been thinking like that this whole time?"

"Well yes!" she took a breath to compose herself, looking more like her calm, neutral self. "Yes, it was recommended that I keep my distance considering how…unpredictable I could be."

But you don't have to protect me, I'm not afraid of you!

The Third Person nodded understandingly. "You know on the way here, Anna and I were talking –"

"Wait, what?"

"We were talking about what isolation does to a person, and the things you end up doing for the sake of interaction. Not to mention the _boredom_, my god." She scoffed while Elsa could only stare at her. "But you – you've been under stress on top of all that, which makes all three of us wonder if you're alright in the head."

Anna could see her sister struggling with this. There was no protocol on how to deal with….with whatever the hell was happening to her. Elsa opened her mouth then shut it, unable to formulate a response.

We're freaking her out, said Anna. I'm telling you; she should be talking to someone familiar, not some crazy alter ego.

The Third Person had enough mind not to respond to that out loud. _I know what I'm doing._

"Anna you should go home." Elsa said finally.

I'm not leaving you! Anna was hurt that her sister was throwing her out once again. She wanted run forward but couldn't control her limbs or any part of her body as the un - feeling alter ego in charge peered at Elsa with a critical expression that felt foreign on her face.

"You look so agonized when you say that." She stated firmly.

Elsa held fast and continued. "You don't need me there. This is for the best – now you can go enjoy the sun and open the gates. It's the life you've always wanted, don't let me hold you back."

Oh, I guess you don't know?

The Third Person paused before replying in Anna's voice: "Yeah, that's all very noble and valid. This is actually for the most part good for you – aside from the whole 'frozen fortress of solitude' thing. You're just missing a vital bit of information."

Elsa hesitated before swallowing her unease, arranging her expression into something neutral. "Alright." She replied, her voice level even as she realized Anna had been referring to herself as _We._ "What um….what vital piece of information?"

"Well first – and it's not as bad as it sounds – it's winter back home."

"What?!" she wasn't expecting that.

"It's not as bad as it could be." The Third Person said quickly as it began to snow slightly. "I mean we're Scandinavians, we can handle a bit of cold. It's not like you set off the next ice age or anything. And I have a plan."

You do?! exclaimed Anna in her head. Why didn't you tell me?

"What plan?" said Elsa, growing frantic. "I can't stop it, I don't know how!"

Yes you can! I know you can!

"Well of course you don't." the Third Person rolled her eyes. "That's why have we've got to figure it out. Now as for the second thing. The social aspects of this are quite salvageable for now…"

She trailed off as Elsa had turned away, muttering to herself rapidly as the wind picked up and the snow began to get in the way of Anna's line of sight.

"No, no, I'm such a fool, I can't be free, there's no escape from the storm, I can't control the curse! No, no…."

Anna wanted to run forward but the Third Person took a step back, frowning as the snow grew thicker, blowing sideways. She knew Elsa was inconsolable at the moment. And Anna knew it, because the other two knew it.

But we have to try! Look at her!

"I _am_ looking." replied the Third Person over the howling wind. She sighed with an almost disappointed air and reached into her front pocket to pull out a glass vial and a large hypodermic needle. Anna could feel her heart accelerating at the sight.

What are you doing? What is that?

"You know what it is. We haven't got much of a choice here." She casually pulled out the stopper on the vial, letting it drop to the floor and filled the syringe with the orangish, water/benzo solution. She began to walk into the storm.

You can't do that! Screamed Anna. That's not –

"Not what?" the Third Person snapped. "Be quite and let me do my job."

Your job? No! No, you're not supposed to be here - I WANT YOU OUT OF MY HEAD!

She felt a clarity like no other, like waking up after a stupor. She was suddenly in full possession of her senses so that she could feel the wind and snow whipping against her face, the cold dryness against her eyes and throat. She dropped the needle in shock and looked for her sister in the center of the storm.

_You are going to fuck this up!_

"Elsa!" She called, ignoring the voice. "It's me, Anna!"

"What?!" Elsa whirled around, looking like a deer caught in the path of a runaway carriage. Gone was the cunning, cockiness from before. This was really Anna, looking at her full of hope and optimism, recklessly stumbling towards her through the storm. "Oh no. Anna you need to get out!"

_Listen to your sister, kid._

"No! I know we can fix this together!" Her presence seemed to send Elsa over the edge for there were now shards of ice mixed in with the snow. Anna shielded her eyes as the wind threatened to blow her over.

"Anna please, you're only making it worse!"

_You need to leave this room._

"Don't panic!"

"You're not safe here!"

Ann wasn't giving up, not after thirteen years. "We'll face this together! I'm not leaving you here! We'll reverse the storm and everything –

"It's too much! I –

_Are you fucking blind?_

"I CAN'T!"

_Get down!_

It raised the volume to a screech, just as a blast of glowing energy shot out in every direction. Anna cried out and tried to duck out of the way but was a moment too late. She saw it barreling towards her, then the impact as it struck the side of her head like a club, throwing her on her back. She was looking up at the domed ceiling, cold seeping into her head from the outside. She could hear Elsa calling her name, growing more and more distant before fading completely.


	6. Chapter 6

Elsa rushed over to her sister, just how she did thirteen years ago. She knelt down beside Anna in a panic, desperately trying to shake her awake while yelling her name.

"Oh god, this can't be happening again! Wake up!" she was close to tears. The Trolls too far to reach from here, they'd never make it! Anna was going to die right here on the floor because of her and her godamn….

Anna's eyes snapped open, and her whole body gave a jolt as if in shock. Elsa had only a moment's relief at her sister's revival before Anna's vision came to focus and she lunged forward, swinging her arm in a fluid motion to land a fist between Elsa's eyes with an audible _smack! _Elsa was knocked to the side at the sharp impact that traveled down her nose, causing her eyes to water. Anna leapt to her feet to stand over her sister with a wide-eyed, crazed expression. Her shoulders were hunched, and her hands were clenched, giving the impression of pent up energy like a pressure cooker.

"You think you can just run away after you've fucked up?" she said, seething as Elsa looked up at her in shock and confusion. Anna acted quickly, all three of them with the same objective. The first two methods failed, of course. Diplomacy and empty assurances - why didn't they just let her out in the first place? She pounced forward, pinning Elsa to the ground.

"What are you –"?

"You are coming down the mountain one way or another, even if I have to carry you down there myself!"

She reached out to grab Elsa's fragmented arm, squeezing as hard as she could, causing her sister to scream and twist away. Anna took the opportunity to reach into her coat pocket and grab a handful of pills before stuffing them into her sister's open mouth, holding it shut and forcing her to swallow. She grinned and stood up, allowing Elsa to bolt away on her hands and knees, coughing and spluttering. After thirteen years, it was so good to be out and about! She could feel all that restless, pent up energy coursing through her, stopping at the joints and in her head, making her want to lash out.

Elsa staggered onto her feet, backing away with her hands out in front of her. She recognized this one; the language, the posture, that_ face._ This was the one who nearly cut off her arm.

She tried to make herself sound commanding but failed. "Just…just stay away from me, please…"

Anna ignored her and drew a kitchen knife from her satchel. She held it upwards and stalked towards her sister, not saying a word. She didn't need to be convincing anymore. Elsa had swallowed at least six or seven of those pills. In about fifteen minutes, they'll start to take effect and Elsa will be either asleep or too high and happy to give a damn about what was happening. Or maybe something else, who knew? It was going to be fascinating to see.

But Elsa certainty didn't seem to thinks so. Symptoms of Hysteria: Shortness of breath, tremors in the extremities, a pounding heart…

Anna grinned excitedly and pointed the knife at her sister. "I bet if I cut your chest open, I could see your heart beating!"

That was it. Elsa screamed and turned away at a full pelt towards the door. Anna gave a jovial laugh and ran after her. This was hilarious! To see the great Queen Elsa full of poise and grace sprinting away, literally throwing herself through the heavy doors, then nearly slipping on her own ice as she rounded the corner.

Oh she wasn't getting anywhere. Anna followed her sister at a mockingly carefree pace, dragging the knife along the ice wall with a metallic scrape. They chased each other down the hall, up another flight of stairs, to another landing. Elsa was already slowing down, her steps criss crossing one another, causing her to stumble. She reached another door and fumbled at the handle for it seemed to have some sort of lock mechanism. Anna closed in on her until she was standing only a few feet away.

"You're mine now." she said, her voice low and surprisingly intimidating.

The drugs were having a clear effect on Elsa who flattened herself against the wall, terror showing clearly in her eyes, which were wide and unfocused. Anna was restless and had woken up into more chaotic restlessness. The energy was going to burst out of her head if she didn't relieve the pressure…but she couldn't do it right now. With a sigh of frustration, she put away the knife and grabbed Elsa by the back of her neck before throwing her forward, causing her to stumble all over her ice gown.

"Anna wait...you…. you don't understand I –" she was cut off as Anna shoved her roughly forward, visibly holding back.

"Shut your mouth and get moving!" Anna heard herself growl. "And for fuck's sake, try not to pass out."

Perhaps the pills were a bit much. By the time Anna got her sister downstairs and to the front entrance, Elsa could barely stand up and was mumbling, disjointed, unintelligible protests. Anna had to back out the door, dragging her sister under the arms before dumping her at the foot of the bridge.

She sighed, a bit at a loss as to what to do from here. They were going to have a hell of a time getting down the mountain in this state. See this is why killers cut up the bodies of their victims. They could just toss an arm here, a leg over there, instead of having to lug an entire deadweight –

_No! _Screamed a frantic voice. Then another, calmer one that said:

_Don't even think about it, we want her alive!_

Anna frowned at that, shocking all of them as they felt her feel offended.

"Just what sort of person do you think I am?" she snapped indignantly "I'm not going to kill her."

You…you're not?

"No! That'll defeat the whole purpose of all this!"

Purpose? I don't get it

She rolled her eyes. "Of course you don't bloody get it. Think about it."

Anna gasped and opened her eyes as her consciousness lurched into the foreground. Her violent alter ego was still bubbling furiously beneath the surface, and she could sense remnants of its energy collecting at the base of her throat, in her limbs. This was getting out of hand; she couldn't live her life phasing in and out, in constant fear of what she was going to do next. There had to be cure! No, there was a cure – it had to be out there somewhere.

A groan at her feet pulled her from her thoughts and she looked down to see Elsa, sprawled out on the ice with a hand covering her face.

"Oh my god, are you okay?!"

Elsa slurred something, sounding more like she was talking to herself. "I….I ruined you, I ruined…everything….shit."

Anna could have laughed at that if things weren't so critical. Since the tablets she was given had sedative effects, she had to wonder: is this what's its like to deal with an intoxicated person? She had heard something of this state before, right after their parent's funeral when she had gone to Elsa's room in a futile attempt to seek company and comfort.

She had sunk down to the floor, leaning against the door of Elsa's room when she heard footsteps at the other side. They were heavy, stumbling steps like someone going around and around in circles and she could hear her sister's voice, rambling in hushed tones with sudden explosive shouting that made her jump. Anna forgot exactly what was being said but she could recall in the end, where there was a loud crash against the door like someone had swung a bat against it. It made her jump out of her skin and she bolted away in utter bewilderment.

It was the same bewilderment now. How were they supposed to get down the mountain in this state? Anna bent down.

"Elsa can you hear me?" Elsa opened her eyes and stared up at her, as if through a thick fog.

"I…. I'm sorry…."

She said it so helplessly; it struck Anna with such sadness and pity, she was almost glad to be pushed onward by her emotionless alter ego. She couldn't allow herself to lose hope. "We have to get down the mountain somehow." she replied. "Look, I'm going to sit you up." Anna half hauled, half dragged her sister up to her feet who nearly fell over again, had she not caught herself on the railing.

"You okay?"

"No, nothings okay, nothings ever been okay since…" she muttered the rest unintelligibly. "I should go back, I've taken so much from all of you.

A voice scoffed inside her head. You just never stop do you? Look at you, you miserable piece of work –

"Don't say that!" Anna shouted, her patience cut. "What is the matter with you?"

You mean what's the matter with_ you - _

"_You _are what's matter with me! You are just sick you know that – I mean why are you even here?!"

Because you need me! You couldn't have survived if I hadn't showed up!

"What does that mean? You're the one who almost killed our sister, are you saying you did that for my sake?!"

It was silent at that. Hah, she finally got her to shut up. Yeah, that's right, you stay like that and don't come back! We don't need you…was Elsa staring at her? She turned to face her sister, her heart sinking at the prospect of explaining this. Oh yeah, she looked insane. Elsa had seen that entire, internal exchange and was now gaping at her in a most un – queenly fashion, wide eyed, recoiling in a stunned silence.

"Jesus Christ, Anna…"

"Yeah, I know, I…I…." she shrugged. "Lets just go home." She took her sister by the arm who followed her down the bridge, not in any state to resist.


	7. Chapter 7

"What do mean I couldn't have survived?" asked Anna after they had calmed down.

"I don't know what you mean."

"What? No, not you – I'm talking to…" she pointed up to her head. Elsa gave her an exasperated look and slumped on forward, being held in balance by Anna who was guiding her by the arm. They had been walking like this for the past half hour, inching through the snow, step by step.

"We're never going to survive down the mountain like this." Elsa muttered. "You might have a better chance alone –"

"I've said it a million times and I'll say it again: I am not leaving you. Besides, wasn't there a guy who climbed down a mountain with a broken leg? We'll be fine."

The alters were particularly active, they were whispering and talking amongst themselves, creating a wall of noise that melded into the background so that she managed not to notice it after a while. Until they were suddenly silent, allowing for a single voice to come through.

_I take it back_, she said. _I don't know how you've kept us all alive – _

"Yeah, well I don't know how you haven't killed us all by now." replied Anna. "Seriously, how…how long have you existed? Why are you here?"

_How do you think you've kept chipper all these years – _13_ years of deprivation – without falling into rage or depression?_

"Rage and depression…. you mean like you?"

She paused for a moment, as if in thought (if such a thing was even possible). _This is all because of her you know. We were locked up in that god-forsaken castle for over a decade because of she had to drag us down with her!_

"Oh c'mon, you can't blame her for that. It's not her fault."

"I'm won't even ask what you're talking about." replied Elsa.

_Oh what I care for fault – you can't deny that she's the cause of it all!_

Well…that much was true. There's a difference between being the cause of something being at fault for it, and Anna knew, she could never hold what had happened against Elsa; not the potentially eternal winter, not the years of deprivation or even the neglect. In all the time she could remember, despite the loneliness, she had never felt an ounce of resentment towards her sister despite knowing that their situation had everything to do with her. It was like a barrier in her mind, separating the emotional from the intellectual, preventing them from feeding into one another to cause blame and anger.

_You'd have pitched yourself off the roof years ago if it weren't for me._

Anna didn't know what to say to that. So that's how these things work? A defense mechanism? It was frightening to say the least, even more frightening than when she didn't understand it. Why did she have to be so protected, could she not have coped on her own? Elsa, her parents, her own godamned mind have all sought to shield her all these years – why was she presumed to be so weak? She looked to Elsa who was staring ahead with a blank, stricken look like someone walking into a slaughter.

It was the same look she had when she told her to leave, at the coronation. Anna kicked herself mentally for not noticing it before. They could have saved themselves a heap of trouble if she had just been a bit more observant.

She opened her mouth to comment but changed her mind. She said instead, "You know, I bet it's not as bad as you think it is."

Elsa turned to peer at her. "Is…is this you speaking or is it…. not the crazy one but the other…"

Anna almost laughed at that. "No, no, its me. And I mean it, like this whole thing is still pretty fresh and people don't know what to think of it. Which means that they'll be open to the truth."

Elsa suddenly stopped in her tracks, and Anna her could feel her weight drop as she slumped down against an ice covered tree, her head drooped down, eyes half closed. Elsa gave a deep sigh and brought her hands to her face as if to still her spinning head. "…They don't know what to think of it." she said. "They don't know – don't you understand!" Elsa looked at her intently for a moment. "I don't want them to know. No one was meant to know about this, I…I was going to find a way to conceal it and…."

"Conceal it?" Anna knelt down. "Elsa, look around you, did you actually believe you were gonna keep this a secret for the rest of your life?"

"That was the plan. I was to…. to continue it to the extent I could and keep all of you at a distance, where you'd be safe and I'd be safe. Its one of those things you keep telling yourself and…and you have to keeping reinforcing it and _keep_ telling it to yourself cause in the end you its nonsense." She scoffed and looked around at the vast winter landscape, eyes glazed. "Oh it was bound to blow up in my face one day. Isn't that just ridiculous?" she laughed out loud remorsefully.

Anna could sense a presence in her mind, causing her to pause before speaking out. This was the most genuine conversation she had with her sister in forever. If there was a time to speak up, it was now.

"Again with the 'safe' talk. You are going to give yourself an aneurism one-day thinking like that. I mean, that's not any way to live, it's a hell! And what about the rest of us? I want to get to know you Elsa, and so do the people. It's not too late."

"I wish I could believe you." Elsa muttered as she closed her eyes and let her head fall back against the tree.

"Elsa?"

No answer.

_Well shit. Didn't you say ' _you're coming down the mountain even if I have to carry you?"

_I should have held her at knifepoint and made her conjure up a sled._

"Shut up!" Anna exclaimed finally "Will you two just shut up for second and let me think!"

_Oooh Feisty one isn't she? That's the spirit!_

_We'd all rather have feisty than homicidal._

They were getting louder, and clearer. Since they got down from the Palace, or Fortress or whatever, they had become less cartoonish and ambiguous and more…normal sounding and distinctive. Anna could clearly distinguish who was talking as if they were becoming more human. Anna felt a chill course through her, and she bundled her coat closer to herself. That ice sled idea – that actually would have been really helpful, if it didn't come with the possibility of losing an arm or finger. At that thought, there was a sharp piercing at her temple; almost enough to make her cry out and her mind began to sink once more. She didn't fight it this time, didn't try to claw her way back to the surface.

The last thing she noticed before her eyes narrowed and her posture went loose and straight was her hair. It was turning white.


	8. Chapter 8

**Set after the whole incident, where Anna has her mind back to herself:**

So Elsa...

Do you remember the way we were taught to write letters?

To our parents and superiors it was 'Dear so and so from your humble son, daughter, whatever, freaking kneeling before you…even to our friends it was more lenient but still proper, to a loved one, it was stiffly affectionate, 'To my Dear Whoever…' To an enemy, it was downright passive aggressive.

So given the circumstance and the…the _context_ of our relationship, I have no idea how to begin. I know you're a stickler for decorum sis, so I hope you don't mind that I just start.

I can say with certainty that I'm back.

I can picture you reading that just now with that unassuming, smug look that I've watched you perfect over the years, like it's presumptuous for me to even mention it since of course, _you don't care._ I know you still feel guilty about it; you don't have to pretend anymore and you don't need to protect me. I mean isn't that what got us in this whole mess?

I think I get why the Psycho felt so inclined to smack you out of it.

Your advisors don't want to tell me anything. I understand of course, the defence is not privy to the on goings of the prosecution but they at least could have told me the date of the trial. Were they planning on springing it on me the night before? I wouldn't put that past them. Or was that your idea?

You're probably suspicious now. This doesn't sound like me – where's that springy, bubbly talk, full of run on explanations and clumsy cut offs? Most of all, she wouldn't be accusatory like this. Well you see, and this is difficult for me to say, she wasn't me. Not completely.

I remember the first time I woke up after _6:31._ Now, I know what you're thinking, and yes that's all I can come up with. What would you have liked better? _The incident_ is seems passé given the whole thing was unimaginable and grandiosely unprecedented in its scale while '_The Freeze' _makes you sound like a comic book villain. I could call it '_The Time my Sister Nearly Committed Mass Murder and Froze Me Solid' _but the last thing I need is for you to implode into a puddle of self remorse every time I mention it.

I'm sort of needling you now, that's what she did, that Psycho one. I have to remember that she's as much a part of me as the person I grew up as, they both are. I thought reintegration would feel like I'm losing myself but it's more of an invasion; their thoughts and emotions and memories pushing into my brain like a commuter jamming themselves into a packed train. It probably helps that my brain is no longer frozen – you know what, I'm getting off topic.

We were on the fjord. The first thing I noticed was the stillness. Even before I opened my eyes, my ears were ringing in the silence, until I noticed my skin was had that unique freezing feeling all over, like I had been doused with rubbing alcohol. I got a first hand look at what the Psycho was up to because I had been literally frozen in her last position: feet planted in a wide stance, my arms raised high above my head, holding onto a heavy object that I dropped behind me with an ominous clang. It was that axe from earlier.

You were calling my name, uncharacteristically tentative as if you didn't want to get your hopes up that I was back. It looked like you had been shoved to the ground, facing the Psycho who was now me, still recoiling from something I was about to do, your hand outstretched protectively.

I almost didn't want to ask.

"Elsa…. what…what happened?"

"You really don't know do you?"

I wasn't expecting that tone in your voice. You weren't saying it to be accusatory '_You really don't know do you?!'_ You were in awe, finally understanding that I really had no idea what those two had been up to all that time.

I was about to reach down and help you up but the guards suddenly swarmed out of nowhere and whisked you away before I could get another word in. That's why I'm writing to you now. The trial is set a month from today but I can't believe you're the one behind it.

I know you understood by the end.


End file.
